I am blessed

Today, Gordon called and apologized to me.

He had gone to a seminar about forgiveness, and felt that it was a sign from God to call me to apologize and ask for my forgiveness (which he received).

That call was the most refreshing eleven minutes of my life. He apologized thoroughly for lying to me, never really filling me in, and basically playing with my emotions. I'm a very forgiving person, so I had basically already forgiven him, but this formal apology really showed me how sorry he truly was. Then we prayed together. Well, he prayed, and I was on the phone agreeing with every single thing he said. I cried, but they were tears of joy, happiness, relief. It also helped the idea grow in me that we'll be really good friends, kind of like the "Ryan and me" situation.

Who knows if we'll ever be together again. He's leaving it up to God, and I'll follow his lead. I guess we'll both try to move on, but apparently God doesn't want him in a relationship right now. As long as we're a big part of each other's lives, friendship-wise, I'm sure everything will flow out fine this year. I'm even feeling better about him finding someone else.

I told Shane about all of this, and he referred me to a song by Casting Crowns called "Who Am I". I listened to it, and it helped me figure out my rushing emotions. Shane said the emotions I was feeling, and still am, could probably be referred to as "blessed", and I've never actually felt this way. I hope to feel like this a lot more often in my life, and I'm pretty sure I will.

Here's the chorus from the song, I really liked it:

I am a flower quickly fading,
Here today and gone tomorrow,
A wave tossed in the ocean,
A vapor in the wind.
Still you hear me when I'm calling,
Lord, you catch me when I'm falling,
And you've told me who I am.
I am yours.
I am yours.